Psalm 84

Psalm 84

B.

There is a sense that, when I began to follow Jesus, I did not really understand where I was going, only what I was leaving behind.  Now that my past is a good distance behind me, I have less reason to consider where I came from and much more to consider where I am going.  For we cannot abandon old desires without claiming new ones, or else, having put our house in order, we leave it vulnerable to the enemy to come with a fresh and more ferocious presence.  As Christians, we live in two worlds: the natural and the supernatural—the physical and the spiritual.  The first is the picture of our prison, the second a picture of our freedom.  We are being led out of one and into the other.  We were created as physical beings inhabited with the breath of God, but we will soon be spiritual beings inhabiting a place that I would faint to describe.  Jesus Christ is ‘the door’ to this better country, but when we follow Him, we must remember that it is not to the fulfillment of our desires that he leads us.  It is the fulfillment of God’s desire that makes heaven the better country, because heaven is just a biblical euphemism to describe the place where God dwells.  And, where God dwells, His will prevails.  When the psalmist muses that ‘one day in your courts is better than a thousand elsewhere’ he is saying that to meet with God’s will is better than the opportunity to spend an eternity seeking my own ends, because our will—our desire—is only fulfilled if it is found to fulfill God’s desire.  Therefore, if we are to have any hope, any direction, any fulfillment of our desires, then we are to make the longing for the courts of God our first desire.  If we neglect to cultivate an appetite for the holiness of God, then there is no heaven available for us to enjoy, since, in marginalizing the intimacy that God desires with us, we have devalued the very defining quality of heaven.

If we are to understand all things in this context, our desires being filled when they meet with His presence, then we must not think that the fulfillment of our desires the object of our lives.  The job we work, the house we buy, the relationships we have, the ministries we involve ourselves in—these are all secondary objects and useful only if they facilitate the first and primary purpose of diving deeper into God’s presence—doting and depending on Him, worshiping Him, praising Him, searching His word and His spirit for the secrets of His existence.  If our desires do not fill this first desire, then all the wants in the world cannot replace the blessings of those who dwell in God’s house, ever singing God’s praise.  The idea that God created us with desire is true.  The extended thought that the expression of these desires is somehow connected with His will for us is false.  We cannot determine God’s will by evaluating our desires.  We evaluate our desires by seeking God’s will.  Any desire that is indulged, or presumed to be righteous or even harmless, without being scrutinized by the spirit in us, is a rogue desire, and it will never serve to bring us into the presence of God—into His courts.  But, when we seek God’s presence and will for the fulfillment of our desires, then the unexpected manner in which He fills them seems as natural as the swallow who finds a home for herself, where she may lay her young at the altars of the Lord of Hosts.

It is the most crucial aspect of our faith to search for and to wait for the will and blessing of God.  To presume that God’s will has already been accounted for in whatever we do is the most grievous error since it contradicts the fundamental motivation that God is trying to build into us through all that He has done in Jesus Christ, which is the longing for the Living God.  The most difficult moments in my life are in the search for the presence of God.  For it is something that we must search for, and yet, it is only found if God wills to give it.  It is the ultimate end of God’s purpose with us, and so, it is where we will meet with the most resistance.  But if we endure to get a glimpse of what it is like to be in the presence of God, we realize that all we long for here in this world—all that we desire—is gross and unsavory compared to the stores of God’s fullness.  We realize that we would rather be the lowest servant in God’s house than have the highest honors in this world, and when we destroy in our hearts the rough pathways of selfishness, He builds into us the highways to Zion.  We must relinquish the desires that we hold onto.  For when we make ourselves completely submissive to Him, the Lord bestows favor, honor, and withholds no good thing.