A man sits alone in a loft apartment in a familiar city. His jacket is in a pile next to him and his shirt collar is wrinkled and worn. His head is in his hands and he lets out a deep sigh that signifies his resolve to do the hardest thing that he will ever do.
The last few hours have been spent in that corner of the apartment wrestling with his thoughts. He arrived in that corner after a long day at work and opening the door to his loft to find evidence of a cheating wife. He has been aware of the affair for some time now, but now her unfaithfulness is certain. The affair is not the only thing that he has been wrestling with.
Just a few days ago while out with other couples his wife had spoken words to him that broke him. The words of the young wife have since faded and are now vague, but the wounds that they left remain. That was the final night that she could even look him in the eye.
The man rises now from his corner of torment and looks around the room and his eyes land on a spot where they had once told each other how much they love each other and how there would never be a time when their love could not overcome anything this world could throw at them. That day and that spot are only faded memories now.
As he leaves the loft with his jacket still slumped in the corner the man steps onto the pavement and the cold wind takes his breath away, but it does not weaken his resolve to do what must be done.
He drives to the home where he knows his wife and lover are. He opens the car door and strides to the door with his head down. About half way up the sidewalk he hears the door begin to open. His wife straightens her collar as she steps out of the door. As she lifts her eyes they meet his. Fear and shame paint her face and tears instantly overcome them both.
But his resolve is strong and the emotion of the moment is not strong enough to break that resolve. He removes his hands from his pockets and his hand reaches her and in a perfect motion he brings her close and embraces her and whispers “I love you, I forgive you.”
Prayer
As we approach our deadline to be out of our building I am reminded of God's provision for out lives. This week I preached about how God is the one who provides for us. We are in error and in sin when we attempt to provide for ourselves. God has given us all that we need to enjoy life, to have relationship with him and others. We need only to rest in who He is what He has provided.
We had two leads for a new place that seemed to be promising. Both of those leads fell through Monday. I told myself (my wife told me too) about God being the provision for our lives and for North Church. I think that I finally owned that concept when I woke up just after midnight and could not go back to sleep. I tried to give a half hearted prayer about to God about I trust you and then my mind wandered off into something else. I do that easily when I am trying to go to sleep. I then sat up in bed and went into my prayer closet and simply and quickly asked God to grant me the ability to trust Him.
I have said many times to many students who are wondering about God's will for their lives that is not really about the when or where or what of our lives as much as it is about going there with God. I am convinced of the truth of that more than ever. I am convinced that God is shaking us to our knees in prayer. He doing so to me. I have been a failure in pleading for God to provide for us.
If you are reading this, stop right now and pray. Pray that God would convince you of your desperate need for Him. Ask Him to show you the folly of attempting to provide for yourself. Ask Him to shake your mind from the muddy slum that in which you play and draw your attention to holiday at sea that He has planned for you.
My prayer is as follows. "God, I trust you. You are my provider. You offer me more than I can ask or imagine. You offer me more than my hands can hold. I trust you God. I trust you."
Now Go read Psalm 23. Apply it to your life and to North Church. Then thank God for who He is as the provider of life for your life.
We had two leads for a new place that seemed to be promising. Both of those leads fell through Monday. I told myself (my wife told me too) about God being the provision for our lives and for North Church. I think that I finally owned that concept when I woke up just after midnight and could not go back to sleep. I tried to give a half hearted prayer about to God about I trust you and then my mind wandered off into something else. I do that easily when I am trying to go to sleep. I then sat up in bed and went into my prayer closet and simply and quickly asked God to grant me the ability to trust Him.
I have said many times to many students who are wondering about God's will for their lives that is not really about the when or where or what of our lives as much as it is about going there with God. I am convinced of the truth of that more than ever. I am convinced that God is shaking us to our knees in prayer. He doing so to me. I have been a failure in pleading for God to provide for us.
If you are reading this, stop right now and pray. Pray that God would convince you of your desperate need for Him. Ask Him to show you the folly of attempting to provide for yourself. Ask Him to shake your mind from the muddy slum that in which you play and draw your attention to holiday at sea that He has planned for you.
My prayer is as follows. "God, I trust you. You are my provider. You offer me more than I can ask or imagine. You offer me more than my hands can hold. I trust you God. I trust you."
Now Go read Psalm 23. Apply it to your life and to North Church. Then thank God for who He is as the provider of life for your life.
